I'm writing today to remember. I want to remember a day where I actually thought about how wonderful it would be to homeschool. I could see it now...the freedom to combine my greatest loves...spending time with my kids, teaching, and controlling any situation that I can. I'm finding the more that Josh is in school, the more I still want to influence what he is learning, how it's presented to me, and who his friends are. I suppose this is only natural seeing that up until recently I was in charge of all of these things. Unfortunately, life and the passage of time has a funny way of reminding us that "this too shall change."
I find some of it liberating, though. The idea that, maybe, somebody, may not, absolutely, need me all. the. time. for ev.er.y.thing. Ahh.
Josh was home today on a "wellness" day. We had a jam-packed weekend filled with friends, family and several birthday cakes. Add that with a bad cold he's not been able to shake and I allowed my mommy heart override the teacher in me and kept him home. And as we sat at home today, resting, and playing some of the great games he recieved as gifts, I smiled. I loved that we could just sit there, no agenda, no place to be, just discovering patterns in cards, jumping at the "attack" of an Uno card and occasionally letting my mind wander about how time is passing so quickly (he's seven now, you know...I've been a mom for seven years now).
I've been a bit sad about not blogging lately. I read this post by Jenni recently and felt better, because she wrote exactly what I had been feeling. But still, although I knew that they would remember more that I was there, playing with them, keeping them fed and clean, I wanted to remember the details. The things that photos didn't catch, the things that my momma brain will quickly file under "remember later in a dream, or not at all."
So today was one of those days. It was great. It was relaxing. It warmed my heart on a cold day.
Although, I'm pretty positive in the next ten minutes the kids will remind me why I can't wait for them to go to school...it's the ebb and flow of life with kids. Yep, I think I hear screaming now...